Error

I hate making mistakes. I do it all the time, but I absolutely hate it. It's part of the reason I don't want to blog, tweet, facebook or do anything that risks a mistake. It's not that I think I'm perfect, I just don't like screwing up.

I used punctuation wrong today. I don't remember what I was supposed to learn in fourth grade. I found a spelling error on a sheet that we had professionally printed. I hate when I do things like this. I make a lot of mistakes. Apparently I don't want the world to know. Nobody has ever thought I was without blemish, but any error is a reminder of how badly I need to be redeemed.

I don't think I am the only person who lives like this. If we were guaranteed that we wouldn't fail we would have so much more fun. The truth is, I don't think it is even the failing that limits us. It is the fear of failing. I don't like to realize how fallen I am. Yet, without that realization, I don't see good He is. I mix up the story and blur the picture that my Hero is painting.

I've been thinking a lot about being "the salt and light." It would be a whole lot more appealing if we knew that we would be good at being the salt and light. We would be excited to share our faith if we knew we would do it right and not feel foolish. I would be all in if I knew I wouldn't make an error. I want to be shiny, not flawed. No wonder Jesus said He didn't come for the healthy but the sick. At least they are honest!

A friend of mine reminded me that the moon doesn't have its own light. It just reflects the light of the sun. Some nights, the moon is pretty bright. I've never wanted to be more like the moon than right now. I am full of errors. I have nothing to offer on my own. Still, I want to reflect the light of the sun. After all, He says that I am in Him. I am safe and secure there, errors and all. Once again, I'm grateful for His mercy.

Not in My Future

I just discovered that I didn't know how to do the basic stuff for Twitter. This is interesting to me since I also don't understand blogging, facebook or even email really. I just learned how to zip files yesterday even though I work on a computer for Eyes That See. All of that to say I am going to take three minutes and tell you the five jobs that are clearly not in my future.

1. IT Department anywhere. Self explanatory.

2. Point Guard for the Knicks. I thought that they were going to call me for sure, but that Jeremy guy got there first. I was so close!

3. Zookeeper. It is true that I would be sure the animals stayed in their cage. It is just the whole "join them in the cage and play/feed/treat/care for" part of the job that I am not comfortable with.

4. Car Mechanic. By the simple fact that I put "car" in front of the word "mechanic" I think I am disqualified. It's not that I would be good with airplanes or tanks either, but I think that they all run magically if you just change the oil and give them gasoline. Also, I don't think they drink quality coffee in a shop and I would probably slow down because of that.

5. Professional Chess Player. I just learned that they exist yesterday. That is amazing to me! They travel around the world winning giant piles of money. I learned this while trying to train some chess instructors. As I trained them I couldn't remember the name of the knight piece, so I called it "the horsey." I'm not sure they learned much yesterday. Not my best moment honestly.

I guess part of realizing who you are is learning who you are not.

Deserts and Bats

I love nature documentaries. I'm somewhat afraid of real nature, but I love watching it on tv. My brother got our family a documentary called "Planet Earth" for Christmas. It is amazing. I'm probably less likely to go out in the wild because of it, but lets be honest, I've never been a man's man!

On the special called "desert" they show this cactus in Death Valley. It is obviously a very dry place. Still, every year for about four weeks these cacti have the most beautiful flowers. Right about when they bloom a certain species of bats leave Mexico for their journey north. They have to journey way too far over this desert and would never make it without food. Every year they find the flower on the cactus. It is exactly what they need to get to their next place (which is apparently within Valleybrook Church's buildings.)

This is amazing to me. These silly little bats are taken care of year by year. They take off ill prepared for the journey, completely certain that they will get what they need along the way. Every year the cactus blossoms. It isn't even a plain looking piece of food. They are met with a beautiful flower blooming for these ugly bats to enjoy. The bats finish their journey probably not even aware of the miracle that they just experienced. I doubt the bats realize how dependent they are on the cactus and how rare the provision really is. After all, every time the bat needs the flower, it is there. I'm sure they take it for granted.

It's amazing to me how well God prepares us for the journey ahead of us. Sometimes we don't journey because we are packing our bags to be sure we don't need anything. Other times we are able to trust that He is who He said He is and watch Him do more miracles in our midst.

I have traveled through some of life's deserts. The truth is, in the middle of them I have been met with both God's provision and His beauty. What a miracle this life is. Our Father is so faithful.

Reminders

Sometimes we have those weeks where we are reminded who we are. Other times we are reminded what we care about. Often times we have to be moving slow enough to receive either reminder.

As much as we love to receive this kind of affirmation, I am always amazed how terrified we are to offer it to others. Too often we wait to tell those we love why we love them. Rarely do we thank the people who have poured into us.

As badly as we need reminders, what if we intentionally reminded others this week? What would it look like to actually write a letter, make a call, or find a unique way to say "I see who you are" to those that we love? Take the time to do whatever it is. After all, like you they probably need the reminder.

Remedy

Sometimes life can be lonely. There is someone I deeply love who is terminally ill right now. He is on hospice and is alone. All weekend I felt as though I was walking through water because I was heavy with emotions for him.

I have another friend who just lost everything because of his choice to follow Christ. He still has his wife and children healthy, but everything else is starting fresh. A new definition of family. A new definition of work. A new definition of life.

I cannot even tell you how many of us feel like we are at yet another fork in the road, another life changing decision that feels as heavy as the moon yet as casual as a cup of coffee. Life doesn't slow for any of this. Life continues on and God calls us forward.

Yesterday there was a tornado less than two blocks from our house. Trees are down everywhere. Thankfully we are all safe, but you can see the devastation. Ezra told Nikki that it is strange how people just seem to be going about their lives with the debris all around. I think there are many of us who live this way, thinking it is strange how many speed past the debris of our lives.

A few days ago we visited The Avenue church on the campus of the U of L. The pastor was reminding us of how often God works by invitation and then challenge.we are invited near to Him, but then challenged to a deeper faith. It is in this place that we often feel loneliness.

After church I was trading football cards with Durant. I asked him if he ever traded cards with Jesus. I though it was funny, but the answer was serious. "He is in the room dad, but I can't see him. I don't know if he has cards, but he made the players." My son is a genius.

What Durant said is what we often feel. We are invited into this relationship that changes us, yet we can't see. It is by faith because God says so, but our flesh screams for it to be by sight. After being invited to live deeper with Christ we are left looking around for who else is near. After all, Jesus is in the room but we can't see Him. Many of us our living in this place. We know that Jesus is who He said He is, yet we are looking around us and feeling isolated in the calling we are given. We can't see how the pieces fall together so we are scared that they won't. We are tired of pain hurting, and we want relief. Not just for us, but for those we love. Can't the food just get to the hungry? Can't the cure reach the sick? Can't His peace reached the frightened and anxious?

My kids are growing up very quickly. It seems like I blink and someone outgrew their shoes, their clothes, or their old toys. There is one thing that no one has outgrown yet. Sometimes the darkness of night will scare one of the kids. Maybe a test keeps them awake. Maybe they keep thinking of a friend they miss, or a dream that they had. Whenever that happens they do what comes naturally, they come find us. If it is early we may be in the living room. If it is late, we are in our room. Either way they don't care, they come find us. Somehow our queen bed can manage to fit a few extras kings and a little princess when need be. Every now and then I have to watch my step over bodies in the morning as I go to get ready. I guess they know where to turn to be safe.

I don't know where you are as you read this. I don't have the answers to the why questions of life. All I know is often I am tired, yet I am learning to find rest. We are invited to the throne of grace on purpose. It's there that we lay down our lives, and quite possibly lay to rest, knowing we are safe and no longer alone. He is our remedy. I am one grateful man.

Hebrews 4:16
Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

To those who went before.

Today is a day that I owe a lot of thanks. When I was little I didn't know the impact Dr. King would have on my life directly. Now, with three children from Ethiopia and living near the south, I can feel his impact. I hope my life reflects the gratitude I feel towards the sacrifice he made.

Besides Dr. King there are so many others who have gone before me. My parents moved to Columbus and back proving that the Midwest isn't flat and that you can travel off of it and survive. Now my passport looks as worn as my Bible.

Grandma Ness read her 128 font Bible and loved her God. I prayed that I would learn to love Him too. I believe I'm on that path.

Grandma Lamb found as much joy at Michael's as she would have at Disney World. She could make the mundane memorable. I'm not there, but I can aspire to it (minus the whole love for Michael's thing.)

Generations of people fought for their own equality. At the same time their contemporaries fought that others would have the rights that they themselves enjoyed. People have lived out what was put before them without letting fear or normalcy paralyze them.

Church fathers and mothers fought to love those God Led them towards. Some gave their lives in death. Others gave their life in service.

The apostles faced their own failures and believed they were who God said that they were, not what they had done.

Christ gave everything so that I could know the taste of life, joy, peace and patience. Who am I to deserve all of this?

I don't stand alone. I stand within the story of all of those who went before me and now journey beside me. May we hunger for the kingdom as Dr. King did. May this world never satisfy. May Your kingdom come and Your will be done.

The Trees of 16th

Last week my family was in Birmingham visiting our friends at Lifeline and meeting new friends. It was a great week that included swimming for the kids and barbecue for me. As great as the week was, our very last day in Birmingham was the most memorable for me.

We went to visit 16th Street Baptist Church. In 1963 the church was bombed. The bomb was aimed for Dr. King, but four little girls lost their lives instead. Across the street from the church was a park that was owned by the klan. Our guide, a man named Charles, said that this is where Dr. King and so many others decided they were going to stand for God's justice.

In the park, fairly near the church, there is a large tree. On the far limb of that tree just one year before the bombing a man was hung because he was black. My boys couldn't believe it when they heard it. There was a vote in Birmingham about cutting down the tree to try and erase the horrible memory. For families like mine they decided to leave it there. It is a constant reminder of the horrors of hate, but that is not all. It is also a reminder that hate isn't the end of the story.

After we toured the park we went to the door where the bomb was placed. I think it was getting real to my crew at that point. Though the tour looked like it was done, there was one more place to visit. Charles brought us to a tree just past the church. He said we needed to know this story.

Charles told us he was a "country boy" who was born in 1960. He knew about trees. He also knew about hatred and racism. His grandfather was the one who carried the girls out on stretchers. At 14 Charles was chased by seven white men with unknown intentions. Last Friday there was still fear in his eyes as he spoke about this. The fear in his eyes is why the story of this last tree gives Charles hope.

There is a big pine tree behind the church. Charles said it was planted around the time that he was born. Unlike most pines, this pine has four main branches. One clearly goes up in each direction. Charles said many times that God is the only one who can do this. He has never seen another pine tree like it, and after all, he is a country boy. He saw this as God showing the world that He has the girls. They are safe now. No one can hurt them.

As Charles said these things there were tears in his eyes. Before we left we prayed with our new friend. I keep finding myself praying that he finds that same safety. He is a wise, yet scared man. I'm praying for peace in his life.

It's hard for me to imagine the horrors that were done in that park. The fire hoses and dogs. The beatings and even the pleading. Yet my family walked through it as one. In the back of the park there is a fountain that was at one time "for whites only." Each of my children drank from there. Hate never wins. God writes the story.

Great blog post

Here's a great post for you to check out. Eric's post.

Post Christmas- Joy?

We stayed in Louisville this Christmas. It was the first time that it was just our family without our relatives around. It was our first ham-at-home experience, first 10-pounds-of-mashed-potatoes-for-seven-people, and first skype-induced-Christmas.

It was different, but honestly pretty great. As I woke up this morning I didn't feel the Christmas hangover. I haven't seen it in the kids or felt it in the air. There were presents and food, but this Christmas was slow. The lead up was slow. The weekend was simple. The result, I believe, is joy.

It's not about staying home or being away from family. The thing that is standing out to me right now is that there wasn't so much pressure on Christmas. Nothing had to be like Norman Rockwell. Nothing had to be glamorous or glorious. My kids breath smelled like chocolate covered funk all day and the world kept spinning. Even the toy playing was slower and less urgent.

I think that many of the Christmases I have had were full of driving, partying and caffeine. I'm sure plenty in the future will as well, but this Christmas I learned something about pacing. I'm slow. I walk slow, drink coffee slow and for a guy drive extremely slow. It only makes sense that I celebrate my Savior's birthday slowly too.

When I try to speed up I miss too much. I end up passing what I love and lacking joy. As I sit in my office on the 26th listening to some awesome Herbie Hancock I feel joy. Not that my kids got the presents that they wanted, but that my Savior lived so that I can too. Things are far from perfect, but if they were why would we have Christmas.

On this December 26th I feel joy. I pray that you do too.

Spoiled

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. There is some serious excitement in my house. Interestingly, it's not about presents or food. My house is excited about Christmas.

I'm sitting in my basement right now with a cup of coffee sending out my emails and daily chats with Ethiopia. As I do this, I can't help but sing Christmas songs in my head and imagine the next three days with my crew. We will meet with friends today, go to church tomorrow, open some stockings and presents, and laugh and dance while the ham is cooking. The truth is I am spoiled.

I love this time of year because as some problems (health of friends and family, dealing with loss, etc) come to the forefront, other problems go away. It's not that they are not important any more, but they take their rightful place behind the manger. Bills, the kid's schools, day to day life, it all gets laid down so we can be in awe of the miracle of Christmas. I'm sitting here in my basement wondering what it would be like if we kept everything laid before Him. What would life be like if by practice we laid everything before Him in the manger, or Him on the cross and left it there? What if our eyes remained fixed on Him? After all, that's what Scripture invites us to do. We know we are to do it, but do we really obey and practice this?

Last night as we drove home from Nashville Durant reminded us that Jesus was in the car with us. (I love my little theologian!) We know that this is true, but so often we live with the heaviness of Good Friday. We carry this extreme weight around with us. So often life feels heavy and that is the end of it. We just live "Good Friday heavy" until Kingdom come. Then comes the Christmas season.

I love Good Friday. Good Friday gives us Easter. Easter is probably my favorite holiday of all. Yet it is Easter that makes Christmas Christmas. I'm excited to live in the mystery, beauty and simplicity of Christmas this week. I pray that it carries on well past the week. Going into the next year I want to live with the expectation, hope and joy that I feel in this Christmas season. After all, Jesus came to earth and now He is in the car with us!

Talking about the One in the room

It's incredible to me how much time I talk about God with people, whether family, friends or random folk. We talk about what He has done, who He is and what we are still waiting for. I realize that it is way often that I just talk directly to Him, thanking Him for what He has done, for who He is and reminding Him of what I am waiting for.
This last few months with Eyes That See has brought to my mind how badly I need God to be God and how quickly I invite someone else to be. In these last few days preparing for Christmas I want to echo the other voices as they encourage us to prepare our hearts before all other preparations. May God bless you this week.

Scared to Life

I've never understood horror movies. I don't want to be afraid. If I did I would simply go outside to the jungle that is my backyard (more on that in a future post!) Actually, this morning I learned about wild pigs in Texas and how they are as big as trucks. I learned that they charge at you when you shoot them, which disqualifies me on several grounds.

1. being around anything that is "wild."

2. being near a pig that doesn't have an apple in its mouth.

3. being in Texas, but not Austin or Dallas.

4. carrying not only one gun, but two.

5. being around any animal that runs at me.

None of those things should happen. They all, like horror movies produce nightmares.

The only thing that I understand about horror movie lovers is the rush of life that you feel. It can be addicting. I think often the ways that we experience that feeling are counterfeits to the real thing. We can feel a thrill from a movie, roller coaster, or someone jumping out of a closet at us, but the feeling doesn't last. It may not be bad, but it quickly fades.

I am thinking about this because I just left a phone conversation that scared me to life. I called a friend to thank him for who he is and was amazed how frazzled I can feel by being vulnerable. There was real life there in this awkward conversation. It sounds small, but sometimes saying what we really feel and inviting people into our real lives exposes us to real life. It feels like a raw nerve being exposed and we get jolted by the real thrill of life.

I won't start watching horror movies, shooting pigs, or taking out the garbage at night, but I hope that I become addicted to real life. I like the feeling that comes with that.

100th Post

This is a bit of a milestone for me. I was trying to think of what I would say to both of you readers in this 100th post, and I decided to list a few things that I am grateful for.

• I'm grateful for my job. Some mornings I wake up stressed out. Some days are more than exciting. Other days we wait in anticipation for funding to come in, or reports from Ethiopia. The truth is I rarely go to bed without experiencing some real life during the day. I'm pretty spoiled that way.
• I'm grateful for really good friends. I have many friends that I know a little who encourage me and inspire me. I have a few friends that know me well who hold me up when I'm tired or distracted. They are such a gift.
• I'm grateful for my extended family. I remember being worried about this move to Louisville and what it would do to our families. I didn't want to fracture anything, and in some ways we've gotten closer. My mom is a gift in particular as we spend more time talking now than when I lived less than two hours away! Seriously, you should hang out with her, she's pretty fun.
• I'm grateful for my kids. Last night we were at a Christmas street dance listening to the Rolling Stones. I don't even know what they sing. (Judge me now!) My kids don't either. Either way, the seven of us were dancing around like it was our own wedding dance. As they filed to bed I was reminded how blessed I am by them. I would have never put this family together, but I praise God that He did.
• I'm grateful for my wife. Through living in Louisville I've realized what a gift I have in Nikki. Her faith is pure and she has taught me to see life a whole lot clearer. My bride has great courage and loves well. I'm a rich man!
• I'm grateful for my Jesus. I can remember being a middle schooler who was afraid of life. I had just lost my grandpa and didn't know if the cruel world would win out, or if there was something more. I can't tell you how changed I am because He is more. I'm secure in Him, found in Him, and alive.
• I'm also grateful for jazz music, Longhorn football, coffee, warm weather, the reset button on electronics, good movies, great books, Adidas shoes, razors and so much more. I know this reads cheesy, but it is a great reminder to me.

Enjoy your day everyone. It's almost Christmas!

Enjoying Doc Cheatham

I have been sitting this morning getting some paperwork and administration done while listening to incredible jazz music. One of the artists who stood out was Doc Cheatham. He's this amazing trumpet player who played a long time ago. The thing that grabbed me about him is that he hit his stride as a soloist in his 70's. I guess this is about ten years after trumpet players usually quit. He played for another twenty years.

This is incredible to me. I keep thinking about how we often have this feeling that we have to know the one singular purpose to our entire life by the time we graduate college, get married or have a kid. Maybe we keep growing and eventually our lives make beautiful music. It's true for Doc at least. I hope it is true of me as well. Enjoy your day and start celebrating Christmas early!

Almost Christmas

I can feel Christmas in the air, even as the rain falls when I once new snow. It is funny how badly I want this season of joy this year. I want the season of miracles, joy, hope and laughter. Usually I get in the Christmas mood when I shop on the 22nd, but this year is different. We are getting in the mood early! Here are a few favorite ways.

Jazz music: I like jazz music pretty much anytime, but in the Christmas seasoning imagine a ton of lyrics about mangers and candy canes. Somehow these songs are incredibly Christmassy. You should try it out.

Movies under blankets: No season has better movies to enjoy. There aren't inspiring Labor Day movies, but The Muppet's Christmas Carol? I'm not sure if there are better films. Plus, it is the only time of year that I don't make fun of myself for Hallmark like endings. Elf, The Grinch, They Year Without a Santa Claus. Seriously great movies!

Hot drinks: In the middle of summer I prefer a warm drink to a cold one. I spent plenty of days sweating on my back deck with a hot cup of coffee in hand. This time of year I am not alone. I like not being alone.

Purpose: Sometimes I can feel how much we as a people lack purpose. Monday bleeds into Tuesday and we may not wake until Saturday. When it is Christmas time we seems to live a little different. We seem to have hope for things that the rest of the year we would consider childish. We seem to find something positive in people that we are often critical. So many of us believe in something bigger than ourselves. Many of us pause to ask where our faith in this precious Child is blocked by what feels to be our reality here on earth.

This year I need Christmas. I have gotten to know so many more people who are desperate about their need for a Savior. I have seen that there is no amount of money or help that I could give. I know in my heart that my friends don't need me, they need a Savior. I'm so grateful that into this reality on earth a Savior was born. Enjoy this season in every way that you can.

The Good of Facebook

I'll be honest.  I don't like Facebook.  I'm grateful for it because this week is about being thankful.  Still, for me, I'm about as thankful for Facebook as I am for my back molar.  I am sure I would miss it some if it were gone, but right now I don't really care.  Anyways, today I went through Nikki's pictures.  She has a slew of photos on their from the past five years.  It was pretty incredible looking through and seeing Ana when she was so tiny that her smile was bigger than her head.  I laughed seeing that Durant's eyes have always been huge and that Carter has always been like my miniature guy friend.  It was powerful watching through photos as the last two years have progressed and Ezra and Jackson have grown bigger and more comfortable over time.  I am a very blessed man.
Even though I still have no interest in playing Farmville or giving you corn, I am finding some good on Facebook.  I think I can call it a day.

Looking big. Feeling small.

A few weeks ago when I was in Ethiopia I got to visit the Eshet school where we are running the 10c dabo feeding program.  It is at this school that we are feeding 61 students.  The most challenging part of feeding these kids was seeing how many kids didn't have food yet.  In order to go to this school, you need to show that you do not have income, and therefore need a free education.  The difficulty comes in when they have an hour for lunch and nowhere to go and no food to eat.  There have been a few students who pass out from hunger.  They are otherwise healthy, but there is no food.


We spent our time with the students that we were feeding.  These were all of the preschoolers.  I got to go and sit with them.  Seriously, how great is this photo?

I look like Elf in this photo!  At the same time, I felt like him.  I felt so huge in this room.  You could stand three of these students up on each other and they would be able to stand as tall as my giant 5/10" frame.  

Height aside, I felt tiny.  I knew that there were kids outside hoping for leftovers.  I knew that even if we fed the entire school there are still others hungry.  I knew that even after hunger was met, there are so many needs.  It was one of those clear moments when I felt that the world didn't need Matt, but Christ.  I can offer a little food and a funny photo.  Lasting hope comes through Christ.

Hebrews 6:19-20

"We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, ²⁰ where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf. "

Why isn't there a song about Louisville?

It seems like any good city either has a song or a band named after it.  Okay I don't know of a song named after Brooklyn Center or Eau Claire.  Still, there should be one about Louisville.

Think about it, "Omaha" bu Counting Crows was the inspiration of two road trips for my family.  "Walking In Memphis" somehow got me through my college years even though I went to college about ten hours from Memphis and never listened to a Elvis song in those years.  I do think that I am the only person who would pump themselves up for sports with Marc Cohn.

Then the bands for those who are more blessed chronologically know Chicago and Boston.  Boston slightly ruined my wedding dance, but I heard that they were good.  I'm sure I'm missing a few, but that further proves my point that Louisville deserves a song.

Thoughts

I am fascinated by how often we think about us. Maybe it is just natural, but it seems pretty broken.

We have a raccoon that lives under our deck. He broke the side of the deck and must be getting bigger because the hole is bigger and bigger each week. I haven't officially met him yet, but I am pretty sure he isn't too concerned about what I think of him, his impact on my deck or if his hair is looking good on that day.

He's this nasty looking, honest!

Even though he often outsmarts me, I am holding on to the hope that I am slightly smarter than him and more advanced than he is. (Once I fix the deck we'll find out.) With that said, I should be able to handle basic stuff like him, eating, drinking, finding a place to sleep, and move on to more important items after that. Instead, I stay in the same pattern, thinking of myself way too seriously.

I would love to see what life looked like if we trusted basic needs to be basic. We didn't complicate them. We didn't glorify them. Maybe even we could put others basic needs ahead of our complex needs. I am holding out hope that this is possible. I'm also holding out hope that a bear will move under my deck and scare away the raccoon. That would be an awesome blog post!

How far?

I'm a dad. When I think of the things that most practically define me, that is definitely top 5, hopefully top 3 behind follow of Christ and husband to my bride. (sometimes other identities sneak in, but that's another post.)

I'm learning so much about me by being a dad. The new thing I'm seeing is how far I will take things. I saw it in my kids this weekend. I threw a football party for Jackson, Durant, Ana and I. It was an all out celebration with Twizzlers, smoked almonds, and orange soda. The funny thing was the kids weren't satisfied. They wanted two sodas instead of one.  Chips instead of almonds. They didn't want just football, but movies. Not just the afternoon, but all night. They weren't even happy with just Saturday, but wanted Sunday as well. We missed a few memories looking for the next.

I saw it most clearly in a thank you card Jackson made me. He drew a wonderful photo of us both as ninja turtles. On the inside he thanked me for the fun weekend, and then he dropped the question...can we play video games? He knows we weren't going to, but since we had fun he thought he could maybe have more.

The same thing was shown perfect in a photo Nikki took with Carter in Memphis.

My son is a little comedian, but he's doing what I have often done.  I have tried to see what I can get away with.  One more soda, candy bar, movie or game. 

I want to be grateful for today, messes and all. I don't want to look for how I can get away with more, but how I can live more content. Isn't to want His kingdom more than this world, and celebrate the journey of getting there.